Why Senior Executives Are Terrible at Negotiating Their Own Packages

I've negotiated multi-million dollar deals for my company. I've sat across the table from difficult counterparts and held my ground for weeks. I once spent four months negotiating a JV in Shanghai that involved three legal jurisdictions and a translator. When it came to negotiating my own package for a new role, I folded in about fifteen minutes. I accepted the first number they gave me. HKD 120,000 per month. It was good. It was fair. But I didn't negotiate. I didn't even try. Why?

It's personal

When you negotiate for your company, it's a game. You're playing a role. The stakes feel abstract — it's company money, company risk. You can be aggressive because it's not about you. When you negotiate for yourself, every pushback feels like they might rescind the offer. Every counter-proposal feels like you're being greedy. The emotional stakes are completely different.

The cost of not negotiating

I later found out through a colleague that the role had been budgeted at up to 140,000. I left HKD 20,000 a month on the table. That's 240,000 a year. Over a three-year tenure, that's HKD 720,000 I gave away because I was uncomfortable asking.

What I'd tell other senior people

Get someone else to negotiate for you. Seriously. An executive recruiter, a lawyer, a coach. Someone who can be objective and push where you won't. Or if you must do it yourself, treat it exactly like a business negotiation. Write down your BATNA. Know the range. Have a number ready. And remind yourself that the company expects you to negotiate. A CFO who can't negotiate their own salary doesn't inspire confidence. The irony of my situation still annoys me. I'm excellent at this skill — for everyone except myself.

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